Lately
I have been feeling so impatient. Like, I just want the next thing NOW.
Or, at least, I want to know when the next thing will happen.
That's
why it's been so hard for me to sit down and write this blog {which I
thought would be such a fun project} -- I feel like I can't exist in the
present and write about the things that are happening now because I am
just. so. anxious.
We're
halfway through January and I wanted to write about the holiday season,
our trips to Philly and Florida to see our families, starting another
year without shopping, changes to Married & Bright, but mostly I am
so super preoccupied with where the heck we're gonna live that there's
no brainspace for anything else.
 |
| a pretty photo from our dog park to remind myself how good life is |
Here's a list of things I want to either happen tomorrow or at least know when I can expect them:
-
when will our psycho downstairs neighbor move out? This crazy lady
moved in while we were on our winter vacations and has basically been
harassing us about our "excessive noise" every night since we've been
back. She comes to our door to complain, bangs her ceiling with a broom,
and has even griped about hearing us get up in the middle of the night
to use the restroom. Please, I have needs, okay?! The management has
informed us that she will be moving to a different building but I need
that to happen yesterday. I am so creeped out and nervous about even
breathing without having to suffer her wrath.
-
To that note I'd like to be living in a house ASAP. We have been house
hunting since before we even lived in Tennessee, and, besides beginning
to grow weary of the whole process, it seems like our entire lives are
hinging on being in a home. Since 90% of our possessions are in storage
in LA, it just feels like our lives are on pause without access to both
the comforts of home {my clothes, a coffee maker, pots and pans, comfy
blankets, photos of our families} and some business-y stuff {baby and
bright, my super side project baby clothing line is in some box in the
storage unit that I can't seem to locate and so I have to wait until we
get everything out here to find it and get that income stream going
again}. Having a house would also establish Franklin more as our home
base and I wouldn't feel like Alex is cheating on Tennessee every time
he travels. It would be space to spread out, have new friends and our
families visit, let Bucket run in the backyard and...
-
Have a baby. The whole baby thing is just on hold until we find a home
and get settled. It's just super weird knowing that that part of life is
just around the corner and having it hinge on another huge life
decision. I just would love to know when this is all gonna happen so I
could just chill about it already.
-
I'd also love some magical answers about my business. I want to know if
a made to order or ready to ship model is better. I want to know is
buzzfeed is gonna feature me again and what products are most viral
worthy. I want to know if I should hire help to make it grow, or if I
should keep it just me so it stays small and manageable. I want to know
if having a kid will just turn this whole biz upside down and none of
these worries will matter anymore.
I'm
tailspinning. I can see that. Maybe soon I can look back on this little
bit and say, chill out, you're still in your 20s, everything will
happen in due time. But right now I'm a greedy little baby who just
wants everything to be perfect and done at this exact second. Is that
too much to ask?!
XO,
Annika
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